"Panic is the sudden realization that everything around you is alive."
William S. Burroughs

Cycloramas - virtual reality 19th century style...
posted by Richard Green on 24/01/2017

Viewers arrive up the stairs and right into the thick of the famous 1812 battle. Photo My Bathroom Wall

Walking into the centre of a huge painting that is wrapped around the walls of a cylindrical and purpose-built building is still a pretty impressive experience. But it's hard to imagine the impact it must have had back in the 18th and 19th Centuries; a time before virtual reality, TV's or even the cinema. 

Bear with me, but the term 'panorama' was coined by the English painter Robert Barker (1739-1806) for his paintings of Edinburgh that were exhibited inside a large cylinder and called 'The Panorama'. The effect attracted such good crowds that the next year, in 1793, Barker constructed the world's first purpose-built panorama building on London's Leicester Square. 

The immersive experience, which grew to incorporate key diorama features of real items and scnery in the painting's foreground, were a smash hit in the UK and across Europe, and soon most large cities had a completely circular display building called a cyclorama. 

Built in 1962, the circular building that houses the Battle of Borodino Cyclorama. Photo My Bathroom Wall

The latter half of the 18th century saw the concept wain in popularity, but there are still a couple of handfulls of cycloramas arond the world, and I recently visited the one in Moscow, called The Museum-Panorama The Battle of Borodino

Detail of the fighting, with a manned trench in the background of the foreground. Photo My Bathroom Wall

Set back a little from the multi-lane Kutuzovsky Prospect and a few minutes walk from the Triumphal Arch (built from the original design in 1968 thanks to Stalin's dismantling of the original) and the World War II commemorative Victory Park.

A panorama of the panorama. Photo My Bathroom Wall

As luck would have it I arrived at the cyclorama on the 6th of June, which as the day that Hitler declared war on Russia in 1941, meant that the entry fee of 250 Rubles was waived for everyone. The museum that flanks the building is interesting - cue quite a few oil paintings of bedraggled men and horses - but I walked up the central staircase and up into the extraordinary sight of the Russian and French armies knocking the six bels out of each other. 

Spectator watches on as Kutuzov's cabin and command centre burns.Photo My Bathroom Wall

It's a shame that that the conceipt of a daiaroma looks so hackneyed these days, but then we are bombarded almost constantly with televiual stimulation now. But trying to look afresh, the playing with perspective, and with what is painted and what is modelled, makes for an effective blurring of boundaries. In their heydays the thrill of the panorama would have been boosted with lighting effects - to illustrate day and night, noises off to convey the roar of cannon and the moaning of men.

Knocked out canon position. Photo My Bathroom Wall

The Battle of Borodino was faught between the armies of Russia and France on the 7th of September 1812 at Borodino - a village sitting on the banks of the Moskva River some 128 kilometers west of Moscow. The panorama was completed in 1912 to mark the 100th anniversary of the battle, by Franz Alexeevich Roubaud (1856-1928), and measures 15mx115m. 

Portrait of Kutuzov and a family writing desk. Photo My Bathroom Wall

puzzle Moscow is underrated as a city break destination, largely because of the hassle and expense of getting a visa, plus owing to the relative distance from much of western Europe. The visa cost does make it tempting to visit St Petersburg in the same trip, or even to tour the famous Golden Ring of ancient Russian cities to the northeast of Moscow. 
31 Moscow has several airports, the largest of which are Sheremetyevo Airport, which is 29 kilometres northwest of Moscow, and handled 31m passengers in 2015, and Domodedovo, which is 42 kilometres southeast of the city and handled 30m passengers in 2015. There are flights to Moscow from all across Europe, plus from Asia, Africa and the Americas. See Aeroflot, S7 Airlines.  
weather The best time to visit Moscow is probably in the Spring, when temperatures reach the 50s and 60s, the sun shines for much of the days, and hotel prices are manageable. Summer are great too, with late evenings and warm temperatures - though it can get hot and gritty at times, plus very busy with tourists, and there is a spike in hotel prices. Winter has its special atmosphere in the city, but it can get extremely cold. 
35 For details see the Battle of Borodino, which is on Kutuzovsky Prospect roughly midway between the Park Pobedy and Kutuzovskaya metro stations. I travelled to Moscow as a guest of Political Tours, which specialises in running politically focussed tours in a number of the world's more contentious regions. Or try the Russia Experience or Cox & Kings. See the Russian National Tourist Office


Cycloramas are an endangered species. Other remaining examples include...

AustraliaFletcher's Mutiny Cyclorama, Norfolk Island

AustriaDas Tirol Panorama, Innsbruck

BelgiumBattle of Waterloo, Waterloo

CanadaCyclorama of JerusalemSte-Anne-de-Beaupré, Québec 

Egypt6th of October War Panorama, Heliopolis, Cairo 

HungaryArrival of the HungariansÓpusztaszer National Heritage Park, Ópusztaszer

NetherlandsPanorama Mesdag, The Haag

North Korea: Battle of Daejon, Pyong Yang


Russia: The Battle of Stalingrad, Volgagrad, Russia; and The Siege of Sevastopol, Sevastopol, Crimea

USAThe Battle of Gettysberg, Gettysburg, Pensilvania; Panorama of the Palace and Gardens of Versailles, Met Museum, New York, Behalt Amish, Millersburg, Ohio;  Atlanta Cyclorama - reopens in the Autumn of 2018, Atlanta; Bunker Hill, Boston; and Laysan Island Cyclorama, Iowa City 

For more information on Cycloramas see the Panorama Council

It's Tiki time again; retro Polynesian pop culture is alive and well...
posted by Richard Green on 07/04/2017

Cocktails phalanxed with fruit and foliage - Tiki Tuesdays at the Radio Bar, Miami Beach. Photo Radio Bar

What is it? Starting in the 1930's and reaching dizzy hula heights in the 1950's and 1960's, Tiki culture spread faux exotic venues across America. And though it almost petered out, Tiki's medley of South Pacific motifs is back in fashion - cue grass skirts, A-framed thatched roofs, paper parasols in cocktails and a hibiscus blossom behind the barman's ear.

Where did it come from?  Ever since Captain James Cook sailed through the South Pacific Islands in the 18th century, sailors returned from the region with tales of beautiful islands where locals were alluring and the lifestyle sublime. American servicemen in the Second World War Pacific theatre brought more tales of island culture back with them, and pretty soon grass skirts, wood carved heads and cocktails brimming with paraphernalia were all the rage.

These days we can choose how ironic to be about Tiki, because many of us have actually been to Hawaii, and even beyond, and who hasn't been exposed to a wiff of South Sea popular culture in the air - from Magnum P.I., Hawaii Five-O, Castaway, and even the Surivor series.

Yet back in 1941 only 32,000 tourists reached the Hawaiin Islands, which was unimaginably remote to the average mainlander. That remoteness changed abruptly with the Attack on Pearl Harbor, which led to huge numbers of American servicemen fanning out to fight from their bases on Hawaii.

The islands didn't become the fiftieth US state until 1953 and by the time I fist holidayed there twenty years later, tourist numbers had soared to 2.7 million per year.

I remember the indescribable thrill of being presented with a lei of hibiscus flowers around my neck once through arrivals. I'd imagined that this was standard practise in the South Seas, until I got a bit older and I realised that it was paid for (included in the package holiday price, but arranged by the tour operator).

Now some nine million people visit Hawaii annually, and the tradition of a lei greeting is continued - for those that want it - by companies like Lei Greeting, who offer 'true Hawaiian hospitality' and a 'warm aloha' across four islands; from the 'Classic Orchid Lei ($28.80pp), through to the 'Fragrant Double Tuberose Lei' ($54.45), to the Ohana four lei special for $103.66.

Tiki Icons

Disney's Enchanted Tiki Room: I lived in Los Angeles for three years in the early 70s and well remember semi-regular visits to Disneyland, most often for friend's birthday's. The attractions that caught my imagination most powerfully were Pirates of the Caribbean and the Enchanted Tiki Room.

"All the birds sing words and the flowers bloom" in Disney's Enchanted Tiki Room. Photo Flickr/Sam Howzit

It's hard to believe that it was the original 1967 boat ride adventure that spawned the multi million dollar film franchise, rather than the other way round, but it's true. We can count ourselves lucky that the Tiki Room was overlooked for its filmic potential, but the original squalking extravaganza is still there, though now the experience is joined by similar ones in Walt Disney World, Florida; and Tokyo Disneyland.

Disney's Enchanted Tiki Room in 1963. Photo Flickr/Tom Simpson

As a five year old I may have thought that the singing parrots were real. In fact they were an impressive and the first attraction anywhere to feature Audio-Anamatronic technology. The quartet of Macaws were and are hilariously stereotypical - Jose is Mexican, Michael's Irish, Pierre French, and Fritz German. But in a world convulsed by hatred, that level of cultural clumsiness seems charmingly harmless.     

Trader Vic's was partly responsible for the whole Tiki phenomenon. It is a restaurant business that was started in 1934 by Victor Jules Bergeron, who ten years later gave the world the Mai Tai cocktail too - a claim disputed by rival 'Don the Beachcomber', but more of that in a moment.

The concept of stuffing his restaurants with Polynesian paraphernalia and serving exotic cocktails was an instant success, and the resulting expansion was one of the first examples of the 'themed chain'.

The trademark Tiki A-frame of the Trader Vic's Vancouver, c1961

The fad purveyed Polynesian escapism to millions before it all felt too kitsch for comfort, and restaurants began to close. But Trader Vi's has stayed the course, and today it has resurrected itself with 18 restaurants worldwide. Though the locations are as bizarre as the Tiki concept itself - the conceit of being transported to the South Seas by a few wood carvings on the walls and half a pineapple in your drink.

Amazingly, London is the oldest one in its original location - it opened in 1963 in the Park Lane Hilton. Others include include Atlanta, Bangkok, Mumbai, Munich, and Tokyo, plus a smattering across the parched Middle East, in Al Ain, Amman, Abu Dubai, Doha, Manama, Muscat and Riyadh.

And there has to be an ocean of irony in having a Trader Vic's restaurant in Mahe in the Seychelles of all places. Yet I pulled up its website and the first picture was an advert for 'Menehune Month'. The Menehunes are a forest dwelling dwarf people in Hawaiian mythology apparently, and this was to celebrate the restaurant's first anniversary in the Seychelles with - wait for it - a Hawaiian Inspired Menu and a Cuban Band.

Resolutely unswayed, the company strapline remains the deliriously optimistic - 'Join us in Paradise'. Find out more at Trader Vic's

Perhaps even more incongruous is the The Sip N Dip Bar - which is an historic Tiki Bar in Great Falls, Montana that opened in 1962. There's the usual bamboo on the ceiling and nauticalia in the decor, but the back wall of the bar is a below-the-water-level window into a swimming pool where perhaps even as you read this, 'mermaids' (and the odd 'merman') entertain guests with gently suggestive sub aquatic gymnastics.  

The Sip 'N Dip in Great Falls, Montana - not your ordinary dive bar. Photo O'Haire Motel

Find out more at the O'Haire Motor Inn

London's Tiki Bars: a famous example of the fashion in the UK was the Beachcomber Bar opened in 1960 in the basement of the Mayfair Hotel. A Pathe film of the time shows tiki carvings, a live band with hula dancing, and pond with real crocodiles in it. Flamboyantly served cocktails such as the Kahlua Kiss or a Missionary's Downfall were served, and whole suckling pigs brought to the table with "your own personal unused chopsticks to take home and practise with".

The fame of London's Beachcomber spawned wannabe's of the same name, including several across the Butlin's holiday camp chain, and another at the Shanklin Hotel on the Isle of Wight.

A postcard showing the Butlins Beachcomber Bar in Skegness, where patrons made do with halves of bitter

And who would have guessed, but London's Tiki scene is alive and well and surprisingly vibrant. Bars include the Kona Kai in Fulham, Trailer Happiness in Notting Hill, The Sugar Cane in Clapham, Kanaloa Club in the City, and London South Pacific in Kennington. The Mahiki London is an upmarket nightclub where Usain Bolt - no less - partied till the early hours in 2014.

The Two Floors Bar, London. This is the saddest Tiki bar I've ever seen. It's downstairs below a bland, though harmless enough drinking place. But instead of decor that makes you smile, staff that chivvy along the atmosphere and cocktails true to Tiki tradition, I found a sweltering and drab armpit of a Tiki Bar. 

Workmanlike glasses, tired Tiki tat, and apalling drinks and service at Two Floors. Photo My Bathroom Wall

Yes there is bamboo on the walls and a few fishing nets strewn from the ceiling, but the space lacks love and execution. The staff were extremely surley and served cocktails in glasses that you might find in a school canteen - i.e. no Tiki mugs, no straw, parasol, plastic monkey, or even ice and a slice. It was the worst West End cocktail I can remember and I had left before it was finished. Two Floors, 3 Kingly St, Carnaby, London W1B 5PD

Tiki time in Moscow

Yes even Moscow has its Tiki Bar, about a 15 minute walk west of the Duma (parliament) and Red Square. It has all the paraphernalia that you might expect - from sawn off rowing boats holding Bacardi bottles and ceramic mugs behind the bar, to a floor-to-ceiling Tiki statue and surfboards pinned to the wall.

Authentic Tiki trappings, Moscow style. Photo My Bathroom Wall

It was a tad quiet when I visited for a Mai Tai, where some of the world's palest Tiki staff were doing their best to recreate a South Sea vibe in the Russian capital. The nautical decor included the usual coils of rope and fishing nets, but in addition here is a rather random steel ferryboat that takes up one entire wall of the large bar.  

My Mai Tai set me back 490 Roubles and came in an orange tiki face pot with an orange slice and cherry on top, and (not always the default service mode in Moscow) a smile. 

The Russian ferry boat grafted to a wall houses another bar and extra seating. Photo Tiki Bar Moscow

And in case you've an urge to remodel your living room into Luau central, then the chaps at Cheeky Tiki will sell you everything from a pink ukulele mug (the four strings convert to straws) to the whole grandly designed fandango, complete with bamboo bar, lobster pots and Tiki totems. 

One more thing...The Tiki Dalek conversion is the creation of Kevin Roche, who describes himself as a 'spintronics Researcher, reader, costumer, singer, musician, science fiction fan, and conrunner'. His delightful re-interpretation of Dr Who's nemesis - in a grass skirt with coconut shells, bamboo, plastic hibiscus and a cocktail to hand - has toured widely, including to London's World Science Convention. Some wag suggested the famous metallic death cry of 'exterminate' be replaced by 'inebriate, inebriate...'

Tiki Dalek in holiday garb, on tour at the WorldCon in Reno, Nevada. Photo Flickr/Cory Doctorow


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